Turning Neurodivergent Negatives into Positives: Focus on What You Can Do Today

The teacher sits you down and says, "We’ve noticed that your child has a few extra challenges in school."

From then on, you are on a mission to help them in any way you can, to fight for support for them, and mostly to understand as much as you can cram into your head.

I was the same.

I read articles, I followed experts, and I joined forums… and that’s where I hit my limit. All the forums I found were full of parents just like me who were trying to navigate through supporting their neurospicy child. But they were all so negative! I absolutely understand the need to rant occasionally, but all I read was frustration and anger against the education system, the health system, the government, and just about anyone else you can think of.

That did not help me to support my daughter day to day. It didn’t give me practical advice and tips. I’m sure there were useful nuggets, but they got lost amongst the vitriol.

So I left. I left them all and worked out my own way.

Now I help other parents with all the things I wish I had known. All the things I worked out for myself. And I don’t allow ranting at the ‘system’ in my world. Yes, I understand the frustrations, but Neurospicy Parenting is all about the positives and things we can actually do day-to-day to help our kids.

Understanding the Need for Practical Support

When you’re first told that your child faces additional challenges, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and alone. The natural response is to seek out others who are going through similar experiences. However, what you often find is a lot of shared frustration and negativity, which, while cathartic for some, doesn’t provide the tools needed to help your child succeed.

I realised early on that focusing on the negative aspects wasn’t going to help my daughter. What we needed were practical strategies and actionable advice that could make a tangible difference in our day-to-day lives. And that’s exactly what I strive to offer other parents now.

Embracing Positivity and Actionable Advice

At Neurospicy Parenting, the focus is on what we can do rather than what we can’t. Here are some of the core principles and practical tips that guide my approach and that you can use straight away...

Structured Routines: Establishing a consistent routine can be incredibly beneficial for neurodivergent children. Predictability reduces anxiety and helps them understand what to expect each day...

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Create a visual schedule that outlines the day’s activities. Use pictures and colours to make it engaging and easy to follow. This helps your child feel more in control and reduces surprises that can lead to stress.

Clear Communication: Clear and concise communication is key. Avoid vague instructions and break tasks into manageable steps...

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Instead of saying, “Clean your room,” break it down into smaller tasks like, “Put your toys in the box,” “Make your bed,” and “Hang your clothes in the wardrobe.” This makes the task less overwhelming and easier to accomplish.

Sensory-Friendly Spaces: Create a sensory-friendly environment at home where your child can retreat and feel safe. This can help manage sensory overload and provide a calming space for them to recharge...

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Designate a corner of a room with soft lighting, comfortable seating, and sensory tools like stress balls, fidget spinners, or noise-cancelling headphones. This gives your child a place to relax and self-regulate.

Positive Reinforcement: Focus on positive reinforcement rather than punishment. Celebrate small achievements and progress to build your child’s confidence and motivation...

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If your child struggles with homework but manages to complete a section, praise their effort and perhaps reward them with a favourite activity or a small treat. Positive reinforcement encourages them to keep trying.

Flexible Strategies: Be flexible and willing to adapt strategies as needed. What works one day might not work the next, and that’s okay...

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If your child has a meltdown over a change in plans, try to understand what triggered it and adjust your approach. Maybe a more detailed explanation of the change beforehand would help next time, or having a backup plan that they are comfortable with.

Building Social Skills: Social interactions can be challenging, so it’s important to practice and build these skills in a supportive environment...

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Role-play different social scenarios at home. Practice greetings, taking turns in conversations, and recognising social cues. This prepares your child for real-world interactions and builds their confidence.

I now focus on what I can do that is in my control. Yes, the system has its flaws, but dwelling on them doesn’t help my daughter.

Instead, I focus on empowering myself with knowledge and strategies that can make a difference. I learned to advocate for her needs effectively within the system and to create a supportive environment at home. This proactive approach made a significant difference in her progress and well-being and I want to spread the positivity.

If you need to rant, there are plenty of places for that. But if you’re looking for practical, straight-talking advice and a positive community, you’re in the right place. We’re here to support each other, share what works, and navigate this journey together.

We Can Make a Difference

At the end of the day, our goal as parents is to equip our neurospicy children with the tools they need to navigate the world confidently and independently. By focusing on practical strategies and creating a supportive environment, we can make a real difference in their lives.

Let’s continue to share, learn, and support each other in this journey. Together, we can make life easier for our families and help our children thrive by turning neurodivergent 'negative' into positives.

Until next time, stay positive and keep advocating for your neurospicy learners. You’re doing an amazing job, and every step forward is a victory.

love

Gill

Let it out, BUT then work out what's next